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Depression & Suicide Among Patients with Traumatic Brain Injuries
After a traumatic brain injury (TBI), patients experience a number of different challenges during the recovery process. In addition to the mental and physical difficulties, patients can experience emotional and behavioral changes. Though it may be difficult to talk about, a lot of patients may have feelings of depression or hopelessness, or even have thoughts of suicide. Feelings like these can be brought on by the stress of the injury and rehabilitation process, though damage to areas of your brain in charge of your emotional responses can also have an impact on how you feel.
A recent report reveals that major depressive disorder (MDD) may be the most common and challenging mental health condition that patients encounter following a TBI—53.1% of TBI patients in the study experienced MDD at least once in the first year after their injury. Another study showed that suicidal thoughts and attempts are also common reactions to TBI—23% of the participants had thoughts of suicide, while 17% actually attempted suicide after their injury. These higher rates of suicidal behaviors may also be connected to MDD following TBI. Though these statistics may seem a little scary, it doesn’t mean that you have to be without hope when it comes to coping with these issues during recovery; a good TBI treatment center should recognize that addressing their patients’ mental health issues is a key component of the recovery process.
SUICIDE ATTEMPTS CAN CAUSE BRAIN & HEAD INJURIES
Though there’s a lot of research showing increased rates of depression and suicide attempts following a TBI, there is another aspect of the story that’s worth considering—suicide attempts as causes of brain injuries, not just effects of them. Oftentimes, depression or other mental health issues exist prior to a brain injury. Sadly, the feelings experienced as a result of such issues can lead to suicide attempts, which appear to be responsible for a large number of the intentional injuries that cause TBIs. In these situations, addressing your mental health history with your health care team will be an especially important part of the recovery process. Research the benefits of cbd oil for mental health. Or try to use Delta Extrax to help you relax and manage your depression and anxiety.
Of course, the recovery process for brain-injured patients can be incredibly stressful on its own. Adding in feelings of depression or suicide may make some of the emotional aspects of recovery even more difficult—all of these things thrown together can seem like a series of overwhelming hurdles to jump. However, that doesn’t mean they’re un-jumpable. Regardless of how or when they are experienced, things like depression and suicidal thoughts must be addressed in your recovery process. Perhaps taking CBDDY products and working with a health care team that includes mental health specialists could help create a more well-rounded approach to your treatment. You may also try vaping and be aware how long do elf bars last long term. No matter what, it’s critical that you to talk with someone on your team in order to figure out how to tackle the different feelings you or a loved one may be experiencing during this difficult time.
My little brother which is 26 tried hanging himself. He has been having suicidal thoughts when he drinks. Almost a year ago he was involved in a fight which his head was injured with an object and the head was very swollen. The X-ray showed everything was okay? Do u think we should take him to get x-rayed again? I really don’t know how to help him since he gets irritated easily. Thanks
I am not a doctor, but am living with a loved one that suffered TBI, or traumatic brain injury. I am also a special education teacher. Irritation, mood swings and anger can be signs of TBI. Any jarring or trauma to the head can change the electrical patterns. A neurologist and neurosurgeon diagnosed the areas of the brain in my loved one that was affected through a brain scan. Medications have helped, but we are always on “call”. Alcohol can also play a big roll in TBI patients and the brain. Some TBI patients do not remember how much they drink, or when. This is also true when have medications. That is why they are often monitored with meds by a caregiver. Hope this helps.
My brother was jumped on by a group of thugs and they beat him. He was hospitalized and bleeding from the brain. A year later he did hang himself. Your article was three yrs ago, so I hope your brother is better.
Having suffered a TBI injury exercising for 30 minutes every day has helped me. I has improved my recovery and it has also reduced depression and anxiety. Of course this may not be a solution for everyone, but it has made my life better. Most importantly it has given me hope.
I agree with you 100%, Al. I have been there just a little less than 3 years ago.
I fell pf the everyday fitness wagon then and my life went almost upside down! And now, am currently fighting with hypothyroidism. As soon as I shook myself and jump back on the sweet fitness wagon, I will get back to my better life again. I highly recommend it from a deep experience.
I hit my head in a car accident and have been emotional and angered easily. Nobody understands really and probably thinks I am making it up or something. I am depressed and think of killing myself and have come close a bunch of times. I am alone most of the time and cannot stand to be around people. I get stressed by just about anything and get angry at nothing, even if nothing is going on I will mentally create something in my mind. I can’t remember anything on a list or too many numbers, have trouble with math and get confused all the time. I am afraid that I will hurt someone. I don’t have insurance so screw me right? no help only tests that do not help at all. I don’t understand why this is all happening to me and can’t control it. I do not think I can go on doing it… Maybe this will help you understand what this is all about?
Larry
I had car accident 14 years ago, and ended up fracturing my skull. This happened in Brisbane while i was living there, but a year later, moved back to NZ to be with my family. I couldn’t get ANY help from dr’s here, as ACC wouldn’t cover it. I’m only getting help THIS year as a result of me nearly doing the haka up and down their butts to get some help and I am. You need to speak to your GP, if that person won’t listen, then go somewhere else. You need help and I sooooo understand the frustration of it all mate.
The longer it’s left, the harder things get.
I understand you completely! I had a brain injury for about 10 years now. I’ve only accepted it to myself in the past 3 years. But I have the exact same issues. Every single day is a struggle and absolutely no one will understand. I have zero friends now and have come to the conclusion that I am impossible for a woman to love. So I’m always alone too. I also have no insurance.
Matthew–
You wrote this today. All the other replies are years old. I do understand. I am going through the same thing, that’s how I found this site. It’s funny that we both landed on it on the same day. But I want you to know that I absolutely DO understand….and you’re not impossible to love. Hang in there.
Kate and Matthew, you both are very special individuals and like each of us, you deserve love too. Just know wanting and getting that love into your jearts. All is in our own hands.
Try not to lose hope. I was injured by a drunk driver, and have been struggling since. I have difficulty multitasking and getting through each day is a struggle. I can relate to no one understanding how you are feeling. People either seem not to care, or are to thick to realize that a brain injury is one the inside, not some visible mark on the outside. I realize now that for the rest of my life, each day will be a struggle.
I feel you.
Try not to lose hope. I was injured by a drunk driver, and have been struggling since. I have difficulty multitasking and getting through each day is a struggle. I can relate to no one understanding how you are feeling. People either seem not to care, or are to thick to realize that a brain injury is one the inside, not some visible mark on the outside. I realize now that for the rest of my life, each day will be a struggle. I can relate to everyone here. Before my injury, I was the most laid back person, nothing bothered me. Now I feel like a monster. Sounds and crowds bother me, and I sweat from anxiety. I feel easily angered, and want to lash out. Sometimes for no reason, I feel the urge to kill myself. I was never like this before, and it is hard to except this.
Hey Larry, not sure if you will even see this, but I am in a similar boat as you, and I’d like to hear your story
Larry are you still reading this sight. I died from a head on collision with a tree and came back to life but I damaged the fronel left lobe. 20 years now and near 50-100 fist fights since because people push my buttons because I am outspoken and will not back down and keep arising even if knocked down to the point I win because my endless drive will not tire. I am AHAD or ADD. I am alone and have pondered about suicide because I am so tired. I have been fighting all that I cannot do anymore but still conquer back into habit again. I am angry at my self because I have lost 20 years now.
Larry are you still reading this sight. I died from a head on collision with a tree and came back to life but I damaged the fronel left lobe. 20 years now and near 50-100 fist fights since because people push my buttons because I am outspoken and will not back down and keep arising even if knocked down to the point I win because my endless drive will not tire. I am AHAD or ADD. I am alone and have pondered about suicide because I am so tired. I have been fighting all that I cannot do anymore but still conquer back into habit again. I am angry at my self because I have lost so many opportunities in life. I as all on here wish that I hadn’t survived the car accident on May 10, 1995 at 1:30 am.
My daughter was hit by a half ton, suffered a skull fracture and 4 major bleeds in the brain. She hasn’t been the same since- I have had to get to know her all over again- I have had to grieve for the old strong independent young lady who is no more. I am however, very thankful she is alive. But like Larry, she suffers daily-doesn’t like to be around people most days-suicide thoughts-the whole shebang. I would take her place in a heartbeat. Hugs to all, love and peace.
I have a tbi from an accident a month ago and I can relate Larry. I hope you are better
Larry I understand completely as I had TBI(traumatic brain injury) Diffuse axonal injury which was severe there was not a lot of blood but it was still iffy if I was going to survive. I am currently going thru depression, anxiety and social anxiety disorder, just know that you are not alone in this I constantly think about why this happened to me of all people but yet some positive things have come from that accident. I believe in you and if you need anything please let me know.
I have had 14 brain injuries in my life. First one was when I was 5 (unconscious after hitting head ice-skating). Have had multiple “mild” concussions – no loss of consciousness, but memory loss, confusion, etc. and at least 3 other major concussions. I now have epilepsy and my last bad tbi was July 19, 2012, when I went into grand mal seizure while jumping a horse. I landed on my head while seizing. Screwed my brain up really good – didn’t know who president was, year, etc. Have had 4 more brain injuries – last one was actually food poisoning, where vomitting caused my head to feel like it was going to explode. Packed my head in ice, and after 15 minutes was able to manage headache with tylenol/advil/valium. Am now stuck taking these 3 things together 3 to 4 times a day. Still feeling head-injured from headache. Anyone else have this happen? Memory is bad, and not sure what day/year it is. Keep thinking its 2014 or 2015 and the day is Friday (sometimes Wednesday) – so at least somedays I’m right! Can’t be bothered with what month it is. Feeling very alone, lots of people hate me because I was on Topomax which made me a very awful person for 2 years – became suicidal, self-cutting, bitchy, loud mouthed, mean to everyone. So now I’m off Topomax and just sad and lonely. I know I don’t really want to die, but I am so tired of so many people not liking me. I grew up with my life only having meaning if I kept people around me happy, and now I can’t do that, I have mood swings, get angry/depressed really easily. Feel like whole world is against me. Sometimes wish I would just get stage 4 cancer and start saying my good-byes, which is horrible, because I feel really sad about the people who actually have this, and don’t want to die. No one seems to get psychological pain I am in and no one wants to be around a loser. I get that. I’ve lost my creative side (used to knit, weave, make jewelry, learning piano, etc.) but have lost all interest in creating. I’m broke (in debt) and can’t afford therapy. Wish I could find a support group, but no luck there either. Might try al-anon, as I’m living with a drunk. And at this rate I’m becoming one myself – 3 drinks per day – one at noon, 2 in the evening. And have tons of psychological issues – trichillomania, depression, anxiety, and now stupidity – used to be smart mathematician/computer person, but brain doesn’t think that wide and far anymore, very tunnel visioned. Does anyone else feel mis-understood and that people hate them – due to meds they were on, or behaviors that only occured due to meds or tbi? How do I let them know I want to try friendship again? or do I just move on and hope to meet new friends/?? Can anyone relate to this mess????
I’m so sorry. I am 17 and an recovering from a brain injury that happened a over a year ago. It’s a long,difficult and stressful process. If you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here.
tell me about it, i had one in 2000. life has changed so much,
Absolutely. Beaten by a gang of thugs in Dallas July 23rd 1995. Head swollen to the size of a prized melon. 8 hours surgery. This was after 10 years of football, and 7 years of motocross (not to mention the fights I was involved in…always relocating, being the new kid). I can barely function. Never want to be around anyone, dizzy, headaches, broke, divorced, friends are all gone, lost everything and am just about to end it all. Don’t want to die, just can’t handle this world anymore. There’s nothing here for me anymore. No family. No friends. No love. Cant remember shit.
Yes, i can relate. I am 41 yrs old with a TBI that started @ birth, with numerous neuro-psych exams showing IQ of 80 but yet if you spoke to me, you would never know. I am at my wits end and cant hold on for much longer. I live in NE PA which the weather doesnt help at all.
I wonder if anyone is still on this…Perhaps I am not as alone as I feel.
car crash about 6 months ago. I didnt almost die although now its a struggle not to. I use to teach life skills, including suicide prevention. I dont like me how could anyone else.
[…] Share on emailMore Sharing Services After a traumatic brain injury (TBI), patients experience a number of different challenges during the recovery process. In addition to the mental and physical difficulties, patients can experience emotional and behavioral changes. Though it may be difficult to talk about, a lot of patients may have feelings of depression or hopelessness, or even have thoughts of suicide. Feelings like these can be brought on by the stress of the injury and rehabilitation process, though damage to areas of your brain in charge of your emotional responses can also have an impact on how you feel. A recent report reveals that major depressive disorder (MDD) may be the most common and challenging mental health condition that patients encounter following a TBI—53.1% of TBI patients in the study experienced MDD at least once in the first year after their injury. Another study showed that suicidal thoughts and attempts are also common reactions to TBI—23% of the participants had thoughts of suicide, while 17% actually attempted suicide after their injury. These higher rates of suicidal behaviors may also be connected to MDD following TBI. Though these statistics may seem a little scary, it doesn’t mean that you have to be without hope when it comes to coping with these issues during recovery; a good TBI treatment center should recognize that addressing their patients’ mental health issues is a key component of the recovery process. […]
I had a TBI at 6yrs old (hockey) coma 2 days. At 19 a TBI loss of memory 2 weeks, blood clot in the brain, tenitis, and seizures. I am and turning 50 now. Recovering alcoholic. Depressed constantly, anger is very often. Thoughts of suicide still creep in from time to time. There is no help out there, except pill pushing doctors. Can anyone lead me in a better direction????
Exercise buddy
I am 54,suffered a TBI in 2007 and again in 2014. First one in a car accident and the second one in a shower slip. My doctor is prescribing lyrica and norotrypline for the pain. I have days when I do not take my meds and feel great but the next day I feel bad. Suicide is always on my mind. I have tried letting my doctor know but he just wants to try a new med. I know in canada if you have suicidal thoughts and go into any hospital they will keep you for 3-5 days to assess you. I am also very frustrated at the pain, thoughts, and meds.
I’m TBI and would like to tell all who are tbi an or having thoughts of suicide to stop there’s know need to end your life for life has it’s highs an it’s lows but theres only lows because were not perfect an one day will be for no doubt we are supposed to be perfect an be living great. That day will come but don’t take ur own life for ur showing the creator ur weak an can’t take this test my best advice is to exercise and eat healthy.
I do eat healthy, I have PTSD after TBI, and its been a year and 4 months. Nothing has gotten better. I think more and more about suicide than ever. If that makes me weak then so be it. I think when I’m dead I won’t feel this way anymore, cause I will just be dead and tbh that’s what’s really comforting. I don’t wanna be dead, but I don’t see an alternative. I also got sick on a vacation and it’s killing me really slowly and just making my life hell. I don’t even have family members other than 1 who really cares about me, but we fight a lot. I have no more friends because I’ve become a complete loser, asshole. I don’t want to be this way. but i can’t seem to control it. dr.s don’t care. I’m starting to not leave my house unless I absolutely have to. If this is some “lesson” our creator is testing me with its fkin bullshit & just utterly cruel. I just want it to stop. I wish someone I knew has gone though the same only so I can talk to someone who’s gotten through this or at least to know I’m not alone. Cause I have never been so alone physically and mentally and I am scared. I’ve tried to get professional help, you’d think it wouldn’t be so difficult but apparently it is. unless you want to pay $200/session to see a professional. which Ive spent all my money on so called help. The lady wouldn’t even give me any advice or say anything she just say her ass in her lazy boy, feet up & Idont even know if she was actually listening. It was awkward to say the least, and all she did was sent my dr. a letter saying I should be on meds. This was before my head injury. Yet, she didn’t diagnose me for anything. & when I asked her if I had any mental disorder bipolar or OCD or whatever she said no. Usless dr. I just feel so hopeless, useless and lost, I want help but no matter what i do, even straight out asking for doesn’t work.
ENESSAAA HI! HELLO! I AM IN YOUR BOAT BUT A LITTLE FURTHER DOWN. Well… I was hit by a truvk in 06′ when I was ten. So I’ve had to deal with this bull**** for QUITE. a few years. AND YOU’RE RIGHT! It is bull****! A brain injury can make you want to rip out all of your hair and run back into the street or however you got your injury just to finish the job. It’s diffcult. And inconsistent and it sucks. And sometimes you dont see any progress at all! And it kills you inside. BUT this isn’t the narrative. We aren’t doomed to be dysfunctional. Even though a lot of the time, thats EXACTLY what it feels like. BUT it’s all about YOUR journey. This is YOUR storybook! And we’ve just passed the part where the tragedy births a hero!! It’s all about writing your story, man. I have a mood disorder with my tbi. Every few days I am the most dysfunctional person in the world. Every few days I am completely useless. I contribute nothing
And I want nothing more than to die. BUT every other day! I’m working hard to go to school to help lil brain damaged kids like I was! And honestly? It makes those suicidal days worth it. One of the biggest tips I can give you is to not let your lows define your highs. Or you. All this s*** may have occures, and it sucks and it hurts and you wish it were any other way. BUT it also gives you this kick*** superhero origin story! that’s how I look at it.
I had a TBI in August 2014 and it was from a skateboarding accident. I am really lucky that I am still all here. Half a year after i recovered I got into graduate school for radiation health physics. This is one of the most stressful times in my life and I have thought about suicide more than ever now. I dont think it is the TBI I just think its school and living in the Pacific Northwest. I feel normal after recovering but I act on impulse too easily and it has got me into some serious trouble. My family is in orange county and I am alone up here but I am doing this for a purpose. This is how I stop thinking of suicide. We all have a purpose no matter what. If you are suppose to be dead then it would have happened when you has your TBI. Dont give up at life because there are a lot of people that are way worse off in other parts of the world.
Tim, this would be my second TBI and my first from a skateboarding accident. Thanks for sharing your story and perspective. Glimmer of hope in a vacuum of despair.
When I wrote this blog on Brain Injury and Depression in 2011 I didn’t anticipate that five years later readers of NeuroNotes would still be commenting. In my almost 40 years in the field I have learned that the issue of brain injury and depression is a very real problem for people living with brain injury and clearly it cannot be swept under the rug.
Brain injury produces complex psychological losses for people and affects the very core of a person’s identity. We have learned over the years that psychological recovery is not necessarily a linear process. Each person will be on their own trajectory of recovery, with different phases and with a timeline unique to each person. Resilience is an important factor in that recovery. Our goal in rehabilitation and in the post-rehabilitation phases is to help each person through the process of dealing with a very real loss and in accessing their strengths and resilience to move forward.
I want to thank each person who commented on this blog for their contribution to the topic. Each person addressed the impact of brain injury on themselves or a family member and many spoke to the process of recovery of self and acceptance of the changes brought about by brain injury. The Brain Injury Community works in powerful ways and can offer incredible support for its members. The comments this blog elicited heightened my awareness of the high importance of connection in the brain injury community. That connection can help you through the healing process.
Thanks to all for sharing.
Rolf B. Gainer, PhD
Tulsa, Oklahoma
I so agree with you.
I feel like a foreigner.
I have always been A very empathetic person.
I’ve always felt it was a gift. Now, with a TBI and PTSD,, I do not.
Being compassionate for others, before I walked in these”new shoes”,felt good to me. Now, I feel so alone, people who have other disabilities, don’t grasp a brain injured person as having disabilities … because our injuries are invisible. People who are considered not disabled, don’t think we are disabled, so how do we compensate. Where do we file in
Because intuitively we know this, we try and compensate..which any disability creates this dynamic… But it is difficult to make your brain compensate… It’s a oxymoron… Catch 22
Thank you for writing this article. My TBI was back in 1982. 49 days in Hospital. I was brought home somewhat still out of it. My mom was a nurse, she had nurse friends who helped with some of the initial stuff. Reading some of the comments has been interesting.
We continue to receive responses to this blog on Brain Injury, Depression and Suicide. It is obviously a topic which is vitally important to people living with a brain injury and their loved ones. Some of the responses we receive are deeply personal and are an outpouring of the pain and suffering the person experiences as a result of their injury. We make every attempt to respond to those emails on a confidential, personal and timely basis and encourage the person to find help quickly. Other responses to this blog we post as we believe that there is much to be shared in terms of not feeling alone with the problem and, through that, to support an exchange of communication.
Many people who have a brain injury experience depression and suicidal thoughts are not uncommon as people struggle with the changes in their lives and personal loss. We know that it is difficult to work through the changes caused by brain injury without support and professional help. That help and support is available through brain injury support groups in your community and now through some support groups in the on-line community. It is important that you not feel alone and reach out to others. There is help and hope available for you.
I was in a car accident when I was a senior
in College in Massachusetts… I was in a coma for 18-days.
meningitis, bronchitis & pneumonia wth 4 months in hospitals.
After I started & completed a stint with Sr ayor Kennedy & returned
To college to complete my bachelor’s. I wrote for a newspaper
& worked to get Ted Kennedy reflected ., but since then have
Been married for 11years, but ended in divorce much to my
Sorrow… Suicide has crossed my mind numerous tines but
I have an 11-year-old daughter,
Hi my names adam. I suffered a brain injury durby drug overdose 6 months ago. I took 210 mg of pills and smoked ontop of it and ever since I haven’t been the same. I have no attention my brain just feels contested and I can barley think. My speech is slurred and it is very difficult sometimes just to conversation. I realize in my position now Im going to be alone for the rest of my life. Im only 18 and the whole rest of my life is ruined. I don’t know what to do now and I really want all the pain to end. Death seems to be the only answer. All I ever wanted was a pretty girl to call my own but it seems now this will never happen in my life and I will just be a lonely zombie the rest of my miserable existence. I used to love to talk and be with friends and now it’s just hard to be around them and try to be part of the group cause im so fried and I’ve been phased out because of my problems. Nobody wants to hang with a vegetable. Im planning on doing it when my friends go off to college. I just want out I realize im never going back to normal and I’ve just accepted im going to suffer for whatever time I have left. I just wish this didn’t happen but its my fault so I can’t do anything about it
My life has been very tragic from falling 30 feet while hiking in the Rockies to divorcing my husband when I was 43, when our kids were only 5 and 8 to shuttling our kids for 5 years back and forth between my unorganized apartment to stepping in front of a train when
I
was 48. I am only 49 and live in an assisted living facility with the elderly and disabled with very little contact with my kids. My tragic life is due to the fact that I was not taught the most important lesson after my head injury – that of emotional maturity. A head injury effects you the rest of your life. In every relationship you always must be sensitive to the other person’s emotional needs. If you do this you must be lucky enough to meet someone who wants to be your spouse. You must first and foremost be sensitive to that person’s emotional needs. If you decide together to have kids, realize that you need your spouse to raise those kids.
I was rear-ended whilst at a stoplight by someone going between thirty-five to forty mph. I was leaning forward, with hands & head on steering wheel when this happened. My head moved backward and smashed into the headrest.
I have not felt the same since this accident, occurring on St Patrick’s Day. The driver said he was “distracted”…. Duh.
I find I am quick to anger, especially when I observe a driver yelling into a cel phone in a car next to me….
My life has changed: I’m sometimes awakened by bright & intense colors while dreaming, it’s like a light show and then I have difficulty returning to sleep. Balance is really ‘off,’ especially when standing on my right foot. Sometimes…my vision reminds me of a cheaply produced animation, as the world appears to be visually chattering.
One of my Therapists queried me on whether or not I’ve had “suicidal thoughts” and when I replied I had, sent a Note to my Internist. OMG….. He looked at me and was not pleased…but that was just an in-the-moment reply, which is now part of my record — Oh, joy..!
Do I feel like suicide…. Yes…at times. My dear wife is a hoarder and its harder for me to navigate through her accumulation of boxes & other ‘stuff’ without tripping. We have a four thousand sq ft house, brimming with her treasures…..
I’m tripping all the time, now. I am so powerless over my environment…. I’m afraid….
I was in a bicycle crash in October 2015. I was unconscious for an hour as a result of a head injury and also suffered a broken pelvis and a few other injuries.The bones healed but the affects of the concussion have lingered.
I was lucky to have insurance and got first class care and therapy. I got a lot of good advice. But I can relate to everything that’s been said above.
The dark thoughts of hopelessness grip me every other night. It’s totally irrational but it is also overpowering. Often I wish I had never woken up after the crash.
But here we are, carrying on. My advice, see the night through, and then sit in a park near the hospital and wait for someone to talk to you. Any stranger will do, and when you hear their stories you will realise how lucky you are to be here on this planet right now.
Don’t give up.
Hi my name is Jason I was involved in a ninety miles an hour head on crash into a tree as I got out grazed my arm within a week my brain swelled and I developed cellulitis which turned my world inside out before this I was training.guys one for the bodybuilding universe now I have slowly lost my friends and am about to lose a beautiful wife and daughter I cannot seem to say the right things or do I try to train and do cardio I’m currently taking 80mg OxyContin and 80mginstant release 60 mg morphine diazepam neproxen if tried suicide once which my wife cut me down i can’t do a. Thing right yet I love them both I keep trying my hardest to make them happy but I just seem to keep hurting them if eel like I can’t wait to stop thinking anymore
Hello everyone, my husband suffered a severe TBI late Feb this year, ICU, craniectomy/plasty and medical rehab as we were in a country with no neurological help…managed to get him back to UK only to be let down by neuro rehab with massive delays and no community help. He is due to go into neuro rehab within 10 days but has periods of total abject despondency. He really needs help, and I don’t want him to be consumed with suicidal thoughts like this. Does anyone have any suggestions? He has cognitive problems in understanding what I say, memory etc all the usual. Ex-services. Thanks for reading.
high guys am sitting hear in tears reading this, i understand all of you very well , my first tbi at 4, another at 26, 4 tbis in all and 6 strokes, had almost half my brain removed, tried suicide many times just to end up worse off and in comas, i just want to die, the only family member that tried to understand me and help me was my dad and he died 3 weeks ago the other family members tell me il be right youl get over it, they should put us down after 10 years if we have no quality of life,
Thanks you for your email to NeuroNotes blog regarding your personal story. Clearly, you have experienced a difficult time with personal losses related to your brain injuries and strokes and most recently by your father’s death. It sounds like he was a major support person for you in your life. You are probably at a point where you need to find some additional supports through trusted friends and family members, someone through a brain injury support group, a minister or a professional counselor. It is highly important for you to find help in dealing with your loss.
In an emergency if you feel that you are at risk for hurting yourself you should go to a hospital Emergency Room or call the Mental Health emergency helpline in your community.
Many people living with brain injury disabilities face depression and find that they can benefit from supportive counseling. For all of us, the loss of an important person in our lives is not an event that we can get over easily and seeking help is not a sign of weakness, but rather it is a sign of strength.
Again, thank you for openly sharing your story. Please get yourself the support and help you need in your community.
Rolf B. Gainer, PhD
My son had an auto accident in 1985 was in a coma for a couple of months with a traumatic brain injury. He also is ADHD, after accident through the years he became addicted to prescription pain medications and now alcoholic. He falls all the time and had 12 or more major surgeries. He is divorced, his brothers will have nothing to do with him and he sees his daughter rarely as she works and goes to school and most of his friends are no longer around. My husband and I are the only ones there for him. I, personally, have been there and at my age now, I am emotionally and physically drained and don’t know where to turn for help. He can’t just go to an alcoholic place for help because he also needs a place familiar with TBI as he doesn’t comprend, he gets very angry and he won’t go for help voluntarily. He is 53 and I am almost 74. Does anyone know where on the west coast of FL there is a dual facility that help someone that had a TBI 31 years ago and now alcoholism? HELP PLEASE I LIVE MY SON !
Hi. I am also in same boat. I am glad to see I am not alone. I am sad to see how many of us think of suicide. I did try, but now it is just thoughts. However, they found a mass in my chest wall and I refused biopsy even though the Drs at the Cancer Centre were very firm. Is that a form a suicide? It may be. But I will never let them biopsy me. Not only are my senses all crazy and pain is worse now, but I can’t go thru any treatment if it was anyway. I am not afraid to be done with this.
Hi Rachel,
I was so saddened to read your comment on our blog, “Depression & Suicide Among Patients with Traumatic Brain Injuries.” I’m glad, though, that by reading the other comments, you realize you are not alone.
Facing a serious health issue as you are, in addition to dealing with the ongoing effects of your brain injury, is beyond difficult. I strongly encourage you to reach out in your local community for help. I know it can be a tough step to take, but you’ve already reached out by sending in your comment.The next step for you is to get some support while you make these decisions. The Brain Injury Association of America (www.biaa.org) is a great place to start to find out what support groups are available where you live. If you ever feel you are not safe alone, please call 911 or go to your nearest hospital emergency room.
Let us know if you need any further help in finding support. Hope can be found in connecting with other people who are going through similar struggles.
Please take care of yourself.
All the best,
M.J.
I’m done with wishing I was normal again.
I’m 20, nearly 21. A male.
I’ll never be allowed back in the army with my head injury.
I was discharged for the accusation of me driving drunk, only for me to go to court for it after I was discharged, and the case got thrown out due to lack of evidence.
Instead of talking, I got depressed and in a failed suicide attempt, I now suffer from a traumatic brain injury. It’s been 2 months since I totaled my car.
I thought at first I’d be normal, but I’m not.
I’m no where near as good with words or as prideful as I was before. My neck is still fractured and I look like a joke.
I’m not going to fail this time.
I suffered a TBI from a surfing accident and just saying this is hard enough but pulling out if is no doubt the biggest fight I’ve had, it’s been almost four long months and there has been no changes in my symptoms, I’ve thought about suicide twice but basically chickened out, I’m not sure how long I can live like this. I feel for people with TBI’s and if I survive I promise to be an advocate and help where I can.
A year ago while running up a flight of stairs from the underground parking I landed full fource on the right side of my skull which knocked me unconscience. Running up the stairs from work to hold my kids as I did evey day. The children were at their friends when this happened. when I came to I stood up then went down that flight of stairs on my spine and landed on the back of my skull on the concrete. The landlord had removed the railings from this set of stairs we will never know if having a railing could have prevented this entire event. Somehow, I don’t recall, I climbed 4 flights of stairs to my bed room where I laid bleeding and barfing for 5 days. I just didn’ have he sence to know what to do. My children ultimately called their father who came to my home, he took one look at me black eyes, broken nose and blood everywherepicked me up and carried me to the hospital. Several ambulance rides later I survived. My ex husband took me to court to take custody of our children as I was not fit to care for them. The courts agreed and I lost my children. without child support payments I could not afford to pay my rent to own place anymore. So then Iost my home and was homeless and injured for months. I lost my drivers license and car as well. Though I spent what little I had left on movers they somehow didn’t move everything and though my landlord was well aware of the trouble I was facing he changed the locks on the doors and so Idon’t even have clothes. Prior to this injury I worked in the inner city where I live I ran a food program that fed 185 homeless people every day and my life was filled with grace. I can write to this now that every day I saw someone collapse due to addiction or mental illness andain they would lay there hand stretched out, though these people had absolutely nothing some one would always come and pick them up. sometimes is was me. I feel now that I am that person on the ground with my hand outreached and no one is coming. My friends and family have completely abandoned me. My small children don’t want to see me. I have a 28 year old son that I raised alone he hasn’t called me once to see if I need anything not so much as a ride to buy groceries. The people that I devoted my life to and the causes that gave my life meaning and purpose are gone. I am alone every single da. today I tried to contact many people that I have bailed over the years in search of a ride to my doctors as I feel very suicidal. Guess what no one took my call or returned it. I didn’t explain why I need to go to the doctor. In fact I have n’t talked to anyone about this because this all sounds weak and pathetic and I’m ashamed. I am certain that I was a good mother to all my children, I was a good wife a good sister and friend. My work life was devoted to helping my community.
My life has no purpose anymore. Today is like a rogue wave emotionally on me and I feel hopeless. I don’t understand why I survived that fall. I am ever so lost and don’t know what to do anymore. I would never tell anyone this as I fear they will put me in the loony bin where I can assure you just like my stay in the hospital I will have no visitors. I don’t see how that will be helpful. Just lost a year since the fall I am more lost as ever. I have never been this glum and it is really scary. I exercise every day and take ls of vitamins drink plenty of water I am doing all I can to help myself, yet here I am.
I am so sorry for you Chloe. Please try to stay strong and rebuild your life. A new life. Forget those that have ignored and let you down. Have you thought about writing your story, as in book form and submitting it. Maybe your story would not only give you a new purpose in life, but would help others in a similar situation.
Hi my name is Chloe, I wrote a fairly long reply last night when I was just trying to get through
another night, I suffered a TBI a year ago and have lost everything due to it. I was hoping for some feedback because I feel so alone. Last night was one of the darkest ever and I was filled with fear to even post how I was feeling. I came back to this site to see if anyone had offered support or solutions but as I can see my story did not qualify for this page. I am as invisible as I felt last night and clearly have nothing to contribute not even here.
Chloe, I know you will probably never reach this message but just now I am happy to help and would keep in touch with you if you ever feel depressed. I am just a text message away. Please notice this message and always remember you are not alone in this. Have a nice day. Later 😉
Oh one last thought, KEEP FIGHTING!!!! We are all struggling in TBI.
I had depression and anxiety as a teenager but when I was 24 I got in a near fatal car accident and was air lifted to the hospital with a TBI. It’s just over 2 years later and the depression and anxiety are much worse. I was suicidal years ago and attempted but failed. I read many of the comments here and I’m almost in tears reading how there’s people like me. I feel like so many of you. If any of you believe in God, pray. I’m as stuck as You all and it’s all I can figure out to do.
I am from the UK. I suffered a fracture to the skull and bruising on the brain after trying to prevent an attack on somebody as I was passing by. I was knocked unconscious after my head hit the pavement. I found out later that I was beaten after I was knocked unconscious. This happened back in 2001. I suffered major headaches for a few years after and even now still get this strange sharp very sudden pain that lasts a matter of seconds. Within the year of suffering the injury my moods went down hill. Other people did notice changes in me or my behavior. I saw my GP and he referred me to a therapist which I found completely unhelpful. I saw a further two therapists and was put on fluoxetine. Neither the therapist or the anti depressants helped and after seeing my GP, all he could say was that the UK were a long way behind in treating head injuries. I gave up and muddled on with life, now and then slowly deteriorating and sometimes feeling like I just wanted to die. For the past four years my mental health has pretty much incapacitated me and left me feeling suicidal. I have sought help from a new GP and again saw numerous therapists. I was again put on fluoxetine, then citalapram, of which the dosage was raised. With my moods still not changing I was changed to duloxetine, again after a period the dosage was raised. I am now seeing an NHS psychologist, but still feel like absolute crap all most of the time. None of them seem to think that this is to do with my head injury even though I have told them frequently. I witnessed some traumatic events as a child but wasn’t really affected by my childhood until after the injury. In the same year as my head injury I ran a 15 year old cyclist over in my van, breaking his leg. It was not my fault as witness and police statements supported. In my youth I fell 70 feet down a cliff just missing a large tree near the bottom that would have no doubt killed me if I’d hit it. In my teens I was beaten having my head stamped on repeatedly, but was never checked over for this. In my adult life I have been involved in four car accidents, two where I only suffered either bruising or minor cuts. I often see all these things in my head repeatedly. While some would say I’m lucky to be alive, I’m afraid that’s not how I feel. Stupidly, part of me feels my body is invincible, which I know in reality is not the case. My mind though feels like it is destroyed, or slowly dying. The past three years I have felt like I am running out of time. I want to die, but something holds me back from taking my own life at the moment. I do wonder how long before that defensive force gives in. Maybe that’s the time issue. Although I am receiving help, I fear that maybe I just can’t be helped or I’m just too tired to be helped. If anybody has similar experience or helpful advice, I’d be ever so grateful. I just no longer know what to do. Thank you for reading.
I have encountered over six severe concussions in the span of five years and my family and friends, including my doctor believes I am fine but I am positive that I am experiencing short-term memory loss. I used to black out during classes. Some of my side effects: Short-tempered, I space out on a regular basis during conversations,and I am struggling to process information,mood swings,and can experience times where I act younger than my age to grab others attention. My doctor(s) has still not helped me recover.Any suggestions
Hi, I crashed a car a couple years ago horribly and I scarred the left temporal lobe and broke half my back. I tried working a few times since then, but recently the suicidal tendencies and mood swings have increased dramatically. I’m afraid that if i tell a doctor they will send me to a mental institution, but maybe i need that? I’m really not sure how to deal with this. I told my family multiple times over the couple years and they just tell me to shrug it off and get over it. It’s hard to get over something you can’t control though. This is really starting to get to me…
Hang in there. I was injured in a rollerblading accident back when I was 14. I injured my frontal lobe quite severely. I managed to finish high school and university but about a year ago (age 25) I developed epilepsy. It’s partial onset epilepsy. I’ve so far had a total of 4 grand mal seizures. After the first one I was taken to the hospital via ambulance where an EEG reveled a subsequent complex partial seizure originating from the same place in my brain where I had an injury 12 years ago. I’m trying to get it under control with Levetiracetam and I’ve definitely had thoughts of suicide for significant lengths of time following those episodes. I just started a new job that I think is going to be a pretty good fit, but it’s a pain in the ass that I have to rely on others for transportation until I can be sure my epilepsy is fully under control.
I fell rock climbing a year ago and had crushed in left side of my skull- my exwife said it was attempted suicide- i think it was when I woke up from the coma after 2 weeks, I thought all was good but Im different – I cry at movies and fall in love immediately – they of course pull back and it throws me deeper in depression- I tell my therapist I hate feeling like I want tot kill my self every second of every day – nobody understands and they think Im the same as I was because I look the same – I cant work as a computer engineer anymore and I cant learn new things. I am about to be homeless again because I cant keep a job. I dont want this anymore – I dont have insurance so Im screwed forhelp- Ive tried ayahuasca to help heal my psyche but im still a crazy non employable loser- I think this world is jsut not for the head injured maybe we can see the truth of this world easier- Im about done
I played football.
1st-12th/college/ALL levels of Pro-s. Another decade.
I am severely paying for it now.
Parents don’t let your kids play football.
I’m sorry.
I found out on my 21st birthday about my brain tumor. I have since had 4 total craniotomy procedures. 1 was for a massive bleed in the brain which caused a stroke on my left side. Took me 6 months to learn to walk, talk & eat and drink normal again. I also have severe damage to my right frontal lobe from the bleed. Since my last surgery in 2004 I feel like I have lived 2 completely different lives. The life before the TBI. & the life after.
After has just been a rollercoaster of emotional pain! I developed an expensive habit of ordering things on line! The rush of anticipating something coming in the mail was the gift that kept on giving. I couldn’t and didn’t stop till all my credit cards were all maxed out. This eventually totaled over $30,000. I also realized I wasn’t as fast at work as I once was. My brain couldn’t handle stress and processing data at the same time. This has led me to be let go from jobs 3 different times. This was a very tough pill to swallow! I used to be the go-to person in my department! These events have also caused me to lose my Fiancee, whom I was with for 18 yrs!
Now, I come home too an empty house and it is pure hell! I have no funds, take 8 medications daily and no relationship. I was on an antiseizure medicine called Keppra. The suicidal thoughts would just constantly creep in! I eventually stopped the medicine and the thoughts lessened a little unless I’m stressed. Then they come back, like tonight! 2 things have kept me from crossing over that point of no return! 1st. One of my good friends, went through with it over a relationship. The affect it had on his Mom, Sisters and friends is just awful. A lot of lives will never be the same, and this is nothing I want to put my mom, siblings or friends through! I know it can certainly build up and it is certainly a tough journey living beyond the affects of a TBI. We have too! Even if our life lessons relate with 1 other person we are doing a great service sharing our stories here! It is so hard because family and friends think you’re the same person as before the event, and we know we don’t feel like the same and are not the same! We do however, still have life’s to live and we are all still here for a reason, even if it’s to write about our experiences. It helped me tremendously tonight to read that other people feel and sometimes think the same way! I made a pact with myself, i will never let the affects of this TBI beat me!
The hardest is losing family my daughter moved in at 10( he certainly didn’t want her in diapers or when he’d have to pay for daycare )with Dad (Told me to have another brain aneurysm and die ) of course he did everything he could to hurt me even more . 2 nd husband one by expecting me to work and think as I did before , left basically pushing him away .its good people got me through God’s grace <3 and investigation of trauma like. This thanks
My 14 year old son suicided after having 4 concussions from body boarding. He took his life four months after the last one. I was told by drs that to wait 3 weeks after his hits and he could go back into the water. He showed NO signs of depression or withdrawal. What he didn’t tell me was he had massive headaches and blurred vision. He told his friends who told me after he suicided. The drs and phychiatrist told me that is was probably from the TBI and hormone raging. The suicide prevention organization I have been working w called his suicide a flash suicide. Meaning that he got so overwhelmed w feelings he’d never experienced that he felt no other way out. I had just seen him 1 hour before and talked to him 15 min before his life. He was funny and acting very normal. We were hit out of the blue on this. My point for excerpt is that I want anyone out the to realize is that you have to keep a close watch on anyone w TBI’s. Since my sons death I’ve heard of 4 teens and young adults that have attempted suicide after having TBI’s.
Sherry, my heart goes out to you and I feel for what your son went through, I experienced a lot of what you describe almost to the tee.
Know one not even my wife knows what goes on in my head because I don’t want anyone to worry all this from mulitable concussions, the last on suffered from a horrfic surfing accident. It’s a very lonely place to be, I’m hoping you get this reply and we could possible help each other on both sides of a horriably dark place. Bless you Kevin.
I beileve i had a unique tbi when i was 17 by boxing, i was fine getting hit in the bare head or with a hockey helmet on, but then i got this rubber sparring helmet and messed me up. I took one really bad punch on one occasion ( very first time and first punch i took with it on, but continued sparring for a year with it after that) first time i got hit and continued fighting, after the fight i walked to my friends house feeling sick and having tunnel vision and just felt detached as my friends laughed amongst eachother while i starred off into space, but being young and stupid i didn’t anything of it. For a few months in school after this i was tired alot, then i seemed to get partly better, then a few months later i had arthritis in my arms and wrists and felt grumpy and tired. But it wasn’t until over a year after this incident that my life went down the tubes. My life is pretty ruined. Time means nothing to me, i let weekends go by and watch my life go by. All my friends go to their cottages just like i used to with them, and have a blast. From when i was 15 16 and 17 i had three of the best years of my life, i could of had that till i was 60 at least. And i lost it all over a rubber helmet. I’ve been like this since it happened 6 years ago. I can almost feel my brain loading my vision, i cant describe it. More than that i just feel detached from all my friends and life, I’m always in pain, psychological but also some sort of physical pain, its not a head ache but its no where else in my body, people say the brain has no pain receptors so i don’t know. I’m just waiting for every hangout with friends to be over, I’m not enjoying life, i feel a.d.d. as hell, like I’m counting every second going by, i cant believe I’ve lived like this for the past 6.5 years!. I don’t want to leave this earth, but I’m not really enjoying my life either, its torturous. No one can really do anything or say anything to take the pain away. I’m born and live in Canada, I was supposed to grow old and have a full circle happy life and its all ruined and I’m trapped here forever now. I wish i would wake up and go oh my god it was only a nightmare.
I guess i wish for my ability to accept this, that the injury was caused by a direct blow to my head, as we were some one intended to take especially in a fight. And not caused by some stupid rubber helmet that turned my head into a soccer ball. I know this injury would have never happened to me if i boxed my whole life with my bare head. How can i live with that?
sorry i meant to say, is that i guess i wish the injury was caused by a car crash or something like that. Then i could say oh well i got in a car crash. But the nature of how stupid it was, i was boxing like so many people do safely. but because of a rubber helmet it made the blow 10 times worse? How can i live with that? I have a friend i used to box with who competes and fights all the time with a normal foam helmet and didn’t get injured and never will. people will say well you don’t know that the helmet did that. No. I DO know that., Now I’m trying to get over it, because it all makes me sick to my stomach. I have thought of getting some sort of revenge on the company that made the helmet, because there is no justice, how did they even bloody test this thing? Not only did it not work, it increases the energy to your brain. Like what world do we live in? I’d never be able to sue, and they just keep selling the bloody thing.
the other thing that worries me the first bad hit was January 2011. i was tired and had headaches April 2011.stopped boxing January 2012 with the helmet was enjoying a video game and was posting normally on Facebook February 2012, it wasn’t until April 2012 that it happened. 3 or 4 months after the fact. Why the delay? In hindsight i could feel myself slipping though. i remember the feeling of falling in my head, its hard to describe. Felt like my system was walking on a tight rope. I’ve said a lot here im sorry. any comments are welcome.
Hello, my son was attacked about a year ago Sep or Oct 2016 I have to look at the hospital papers the guy hit him in the head with a crow bar and as the months went on he started getting out of control months after. Making bad decisions not thinking straight drinking started doing drugs he was 20 years old he hung himself in April his girlfriend told me about some of their conversations about how he didn’t feel like himself. We’re going to court for the assault next month Oct of this year 2017 I’ve read a lot of the past comments where loved ones committed suicide months or about a year after the trauma my son lost consciousness but the Dr. Said everything was good he had an existing diagnoses as a child with adhd and a impulsive mood disorder but growing up he never shown signs of being unhappy or depressed he was a very happy young man and was about to start a new job the weekend before he passed away. I was wondering should we ( our family) put the blame on the attack and if so how do we find info or who should we talk to?? Thanks for reading I hope someone sees this and has some input we would really appreciate it.
I was assaulted at my job a little over a month ago. I was hit on the head with a billy club and punched in the face at least twice. I have an concussion and a fractured eye socket. I’m currently on topomax for the headaches. I’ve been depressed and have anxiety and panic attacks. I’m in therapy for the ptsd, but every time I have a panic attack or get overwhelmed and go into a full meltdown the only thing I can think about is feeling like I want to die. I hit my head during the panic attack because it’s the only thing that I can do to help me not go into a tail spin. I’m not in control of my emotions, I feel hopeless and empty almost all the time. People look at me like I should be fine and if I try to express this to them they don’t get it so I just shut down. I haven’t said this out loud but sometimes i feel like everything would be better if the guy who attacked me had just killed me that day. I know it’s not normal but I can’t help it. I wish I could make these go away. Is it the brain injury, the depression the medication a combination of all of it? I feel like I’m losing it and no one knows or cares to know. I don’t feel like my medical providers take any of this seriously so I suffer in silence but it’s only getting worse.
I was assaulted at my job a little over a month ago. I was hit on the head with a billy club and punched in the face at least twice. I have an concussion and a fractured eye socket. I’m currently on topomax for the headaches. I’ve been depressed and have anxiety and panic attacks. I’m in therapy for the ptsd, but every time I have a panic attack or get overwhelmed and go into a full meltdown the only thing I can think about is feeling like I want to die. I hit my head during the panic attack because it’s the only thing that I can do to help me not go into a tail spin. I’m not in control of my emotions, I feel hopeless and empty almost all the time. People look at me like I should be fine and if I try to this to them they don’t get it so I just shut down. I haven’t said this out loud but sometimes i feel like everything would be better if the guy who attacked me had just killed me that day. I know it’s not normal but I can’t help it. I wish I could make these go away. Is it the brain injury, the depression the medication a combination of all of it? I feel like I’m losing it and no one knows or cares to know. I don’t feel like my medical providers take any of this seriously so I suffer in silence but it’s only getting worse.
My daughter suffered a massive TBI July of 2014. Hit by and SUV while riding her bicycle. Three massive brain bleeds and damage to the corpus callosum. We were told she would be a vegetable. She was in hospital for 5.5 weeks and then on to rehab where the projection was a minimum of 1 year but probably 2 before she came home. She was home after 96 days in rehab and returned to school after a years absence. All miracles according to the doctors and therapists. I do Energy Healing and many other alternative therapies so she received a lot that other persons with TBI do not receive. Daily Reiki Treatments, Integrated Energy Therapy, Hyperbaric Oxygen Chamber, many herbal supplements (lions Mane Mushroom, Fish Oil, CBD, Kratom, L-glutathione and more. Fish oil was amazing. She just graduated High School with honors. It has not been easy. Her short term memory is still a huge challenge and she is depressed a great deal of the time. She is focusing on that she is here for a reason so she is working at sharing her experiences to help others. She is planning on going to school for massage therapy in the fall and then to focus on traditional Chinese Medicine. She feels lonely and isolated as most of her peers graduated last year and have forgotten about her. She was always she and reserved and now has some social anxiety. The kraotm has been helpful in many ways as it has helped her with energy levels, focus and cognition, and also helps her to be less stressed and anxious. On kratom er grades went from average to honors, mostly B’s and some A’s. The moodiness and irritability are always a challenge. It has not been an easy road in any way I have tremendous debt paying for all of the alternative things but it has all been worth it. She and I have looked at this tragedy as an opportunity to learn and help others. I highly recommend meditation and if possible finding someone near you that is a Deeksha Blessing Giver. To lengthy here to explain what it is and what it does but it is very helpful. I encourage all to find out what their purpose is. Because there is one. Next year her high school is inviting her to come and speak about her accident and the merits of helmet safety and working through incredible personal challenges that are invisible to others. She was very disappointed that they would not let her before she graduated she had so much on her plate that It is probably a good thing to wait till next year. Yes she has changed and yes she has depression and life is very very different but we, she and I are finding purpose and that has been helpful in so many ways. I hope that those of you who struggle with suicidal thought will continue to make the choice to live. I hope that you will find peace for yourself. Part of finding peace comes with acceptance of who you are now and just focusing on the future one day at a time. Visualize and see your life getting better better and better. Despite what the Doctors had told me and her father I always saw her being nearly completely whole and have held that space for her. It is so important to hold a vision of that. See it happening. Focusing on the negative will only keep you in that place. I have so many resources I can share for any who are interested. I can be found via my fb page Heaven and Earth Connections or my website of the same name. My greatest wish for all of you is peace and healing for you in whatever way that you can accept.
Blessings
Deborah Blish RMT
I’m 20 , and I had a TBI. When I was just 4 years old … I fell off my bed an hit my head on the dresser 😔 and I all I remember was blood pouring out … and then everything went black … and when I woke up I was living in a different house. But the same part my mom never talked to me about the story I guess my family tried to cover it up. I don’t know how I long I been in a coma but , my life is tough. Now , especially in school I had no friends an no one to support me, I hate my mood swings. , I get irritated fast and I never can hold a relationship it sucks Bc I wanna be happy with that one person. , but I feel like ima be alone forever also work. Is just to much for me handle. College was to much for my brain. To handle , but now ion know I feel like I’m Stuck in one place …. I have suicide thoughts 😔😔 I be so close to end my Life. Tbh Like Nobody knows what I goes through or understand me… and I don’t have nobody to talk about I’m not opened with my mom or family Bc they gonna think I’m just crazy … i just don’t know what should I do.. now. My feelings feel numb…. I can’t show all my feelings.
I can relate to you. Doctors have abandoned me and have been abusive. I am a 57 year woman who had 2 TBI before age 18. I worked so hard to better myself after i stopped drinking, all of that work was gone overnight. I had a aneurysm, 2 subaractnoid bleeds and stroke in 2013. Because I did not have insurance the community rejected me and they are still doing it. Now from all the stress and brain damage I am so emotional. I get so angry that I think about ending my life or wanting to hurt someone it scares me because I have never had these thoughts before 2013 when my good life was no longer there.
My son was injured during a baseball game May 2016. He was hit so hard he lost sight in right eye. All x rays and mri came out ok. Six months later his anxiety grew to panic attacks. Seven months after that hit he rolled his pick up truck. Didn’t think much of the bloody nose he got. Three months after that he got in another car accident with a semi. He had whiplash but walked away. Went to doctor and therapist for anxiety and depression. He was diagnosed with ADD. NO ONE suggested his head trauma as a cause. A year and a half after his baseball injury my son took his life at the age of 17. It was such a whirlwind of a year. I never thought about his injury but the doctors should have. If they had just told him it could be that injury causing an electrical/chemical imbalance maybe he would have understood what was going on in his head instead of thinking he was going crazy. Maybe he would still be here. I wish I had known all this before
I just lost a grandson to suicide, he was a loving and kind young man of thirteen, about a year and a half ago he was at a scate park and did a bad fall,broke his cheek bone was sick for over three days due too the fall, I believe that his fall played a major role in his death, why don’t the Doctors share more information about this? Nothing was said about the possibility of suicide by them or any of the health professionals he had seen.
It’s a very helpless feeling when something like this occurs, a young life taken too soon. I hope everyone out there gets the help they need. My prayers go out to all.
My son had 2 incidents of TBI – 1 @ age 12 (brain surgery to remove cisticercosis – pork tapeworm parasite), then @ age 21 he was hit by a car as a pedestrian – his head broke the windshield. We were always told by Dr.s “he’s fine” and “no sign of injury on the scans”. Had him tested by state dept of mental health/retardation in my state & he tested “high normal” @ age 22 – about 1 year after being hit by a car. We could clearly see his difficulties w/ memory, learning, decision-making, inability to hold a job for long, easily persuaded by women, impulse control, etc. Anyhow, we lost him 10 months ago – it may have been a suicide, we can’t be sure. He was 30. I wish we had known how to help him… or at least been given a heads-up about the risks associated with TBI. Alternatives did seem to help somewhat (his words), and he had wanted to practice martial arts for the discipline (his impulse control was pretty poor after TBI, although he did NOT have anger issues, thankfully). He never was prescribed any psych meds, nor did he ever want to go there. His girlfriend introduced him to meth during the last year of his life (lack of impulse control, bad decisions, etc) and it was really over for him at that point. So, note to TBI sufferers: don’t go there (re: dope)! Also, something he said helped (before getting tangled-up w/ dope): B vitamins, especially B-1 when you’re feeling low. Also calcium/magnesium for relaxation. Hope this helps. I’ll pray for everyone who commented on this blog…